i'm not that miserable

i'm content
content that I have life
content with my job 
content with who I am
content With what I'v become
content in all my relationships 

it's asked, " are you happy"
" yeah, I'm content" 

that word is thrown around
more than the word "love"

valentines day should be changed
to the day of being content
wedding vows should be changed

" I content you till the day we die"
that will work

those people are happy
but I'm not those people
and they are not me

i am happy however that I can
piss and shit on my own

writing and fucking

there's probably a handful 
of women that actually fuck
and others that lay there
and want to think to themselves
that they are making love
when it comes down to it
Fucking is more passionate
you seem to enjoy the other 
person more and the act itself
I experienced both

now fucking is my writing
if I just put nonsense words
on paper than I would be
making love
who wants that

Radio Interview

http://www.wicn.org/podcasts/audio/john-dervishian-you-cant-get-inside-my-head
http://www.wicn.org/podcasts/audio/john-dervishian-you-cant-get-inside-my-head

what could be said about me

it could be said
that i
drank my “share”
of alcohol
took my “share” 
of drugs
and had my fair “share”
of women 

although there always 

could be room for more
(as the world is big)
at some point it
would be time to
lay back and let
the dirt settle

the soldiers

some enlist because

they believe

some do it for the

benefits that are sold

(and bought because

of the impressionable mind)

and others do it because

they simply have

nothing else

they are sent off

in to un familiar territories

in to chaos

with nothing but

a small hope that they

will return in one piece

or at least breathing

they are sent off

to fight for

unexplained reasons

believing that the

fight is their fight

they fight for people

they don’t know

and for a country

who does not seem

to

give

a

shit